Friday, September 10, 2010
A Dangerous Man
Starring: Steven Seagal, Jesse Hutch, Marianna Mah
After serving 6 years for a crime he didn't commit, Shane Daniels is released from jail with an apology from the State of Arizona. Within hours of his freedom, he unluckily bears witness to a cop killing by Chinese mafia who have a kidnapped girl and a bag of drugmoney
OMG! Where can I start? How bad is this movie? Let me count the ways...
For years I keep holding on to that slim chance that Steven Seagal would pull his head out of his booty long enough to realise his movies stink these days and make a good movie. I mean look at Under Siege (The first one of course)--that movie was geee--niiiii--us! And since then, I keep watching his movies hoping, praying that they'd make a good one again and I keep getting let down. It seems I never learn. But anyways, let's talk about this one movie.
*breathes* ok. First of all this movie started out with promise. I mean, Steven, wrongly accused of a crime and then new evidence pops up to prove he didn't do it. He spent six years in jail for it and okay that's understandable because sad but true--it happens all the time. Where it begins going down hill is when they offered him millions of dollars to get his life on track, he TURNS IT DOWN!
Let's put this in a better perspective; now you're in jail for six years, you have no money, no savings, no where to live and you turn down money to help you out? I mean sure, I get it that the money won't give him the six years of his life back--or give him back his wife who left him when he was in there but damn!
So anyways he gets released (unusually fast might I add) and the first thing he does is got a car (dont know how, or where for that matter), and went to buy some alcohol. Long story short, some punks tried to mess with him, he kicked their asses and life goes on. Then he goes somewhere to drink, wallow in his sadness and sees a crime being commit. Knowing him, he helps and BAM! He falls right in the middle of some big kidnapping, Russian Mob, dirty cops, other kinds of mob... by the end of the movie it was so damn confusing. The cops were shooting at the Russians, the Russians were shooting at the cops, Steven Seagal was breaking heads and necks of Russians and dirty cops--by the end no one knows who the bad guys were.
The acting was horrible, the graphics was autrocious, the love scenes were disgusting--why disgusting? The chick Stevie boy was sexing looked young enough to be his daughter and I could have sworn I threw up a little in my mouth. The ending was completely wrong and hard to swallow--ha! I said swallow!!--*clears throat* anways...
Overall-- don't waste your time. If for some reason you have a couple of hours to burn and you're half asleep or hung over, read a book instead of watching this movie. I know, books aren't for everyone but you won't be killing brain cells. Or if you don't want to read a book, go watch the snow melt, or fry an egg on the sidewall, or pick your nose...ANYTHING but watch this movie...Trust me, you'll thank me later.